Daughters

You know, it's only starting to hit me how much my family's perception of college and my intentions are different from mine.
Today my mother and I got into a discussion about what's going to happen in the future- What happens if I can go to Missouri? What happens if I can't?- and I basically told her something I've always been sure of. I will not be returning to this town unless its for a serious emergency.
My mom apparently thinks its because I hate my family, and want nothing to do with anyone when in fact that's the most opposite reason for me not wanting to come back ever.
I love my family and I love my mom and my family but this town just has too many memories, too many bad things... too many tainted things, you know? I want to move forward with a clean slate and just avoid any ties. I can at least go to my hometown and enjoy myself. Here? Not so much. But even so, it makes me think about something my mom's best friend told me.
"Do things with your mom. She's going to take it hard once you leave."
I'm going to take it hard too. I mean its been just the two of us for so long and she's been through alot for so long that living on my own is going to be hard without her. But even so, I can tell how hurt she is by me not wanting to come back. But at this point it's not because I want to leave her forever. It's just that I have nothing left to lose at this point. I've been through so much that all I want to do is look forward to the clean slate in front of me. I need to grow up and get going, right?
While I'm sure mothers and daughters have had this issue before mine seems to take this awful hard.
"... and now she's left cleaning up the mess he made..."